At the end of Part 1, I was in my office centering my zen around the sight of the Organ Mountains purple majesty as I zeroed in on an intruding fly buzzing my office.  The fly was bouncing against the glass of a framed lithograph showing some horses.  I assume the horses drew the fly as they always do.  I think its all the hair…I could be wrong.

I pull myself together and re-focus on the fly.  My tiny visitor will feel my wrath this day! 

I ease within range working not to disturb the air currents which would alert my little friend to his danger.  The fan of death is cocked and ready.  The wrist snaps forward and back quickly into place as if there had been no movement at all.  Death in the afternoon.  

A smile returns to my face.  My tense muscles relax and I move quickly back into my chair to resume my work.  I quickly forget the intrusion the fly has made on my day.  My efforts to eleminate the distraction have been a success.   I feel good. 

My daily rounds of death dealing before we open at 11:00 AM are bearing fruit.  My kill ratio is down to three a day with the staff on notice that if I don’t kill anything before 11:00 AM, I get a little cranky, irritable, snappy,as they say.  Some might use other words but these will do fine. 

Fly season is drawing to a close as summer bids welcome to the fall.  I am proud of my accomplishments this summer.  Fewer customers are waving away pesky intruders at their tables and shooing some flys away as well.  Surely, as nights cool, the fly eggs go dormant waiting for the heat of next summer to awaken them for their short, voracious lives.  And, don’t call me Shirley….

Sometime in mid-September I will retire this season’s fan of death.  The ceremony is short but heartfelt as I commend my swatter to it’s inevitable doom.   And, so the circle of life goes.   Next year, I will be searching for a new swatter -new, better, different.   I will confront the minute pests each day and hope I live to swat another day.

Are You Smarter Than A 5^th Grader…or A Fly? Part 1

 I am beginning to wonder.  Not about you, about myself….

 Of course, in Southern New Mexico, in July, fly season springs upon us with the start of monsoon season.  Large – not as large as a Horsefly but not as small as a Tsetse fly (which spread malaria in Africa) – flys begin knocking at doors and windows and any other space they can crawl through to get to the good stuff….spill a grain or two of sugar this morning getting it to the coffee?  Fly bait.   Spill a drop of soda?  Fly bait.  Sitting quietly at your desk typing on the computer?  Fly bait.

 During July, part of my job description means that at 10:30 AM, I take my fly swatter and go to the Patio.  Yes, it’s enclosed but that’s where THEY gather drawn by the moisture of the fountain and the light of the sun roof.  I pause a moment to gather myself, center myself, calm myself and prepare.  I move into my Ninja stealth mode and ease onto the Patio, careful not to cause a ripple in the air.  My swatter is already cocked and ready.  I mustn’t carry the swatter at my side and then raise it for the kill. No movement must be discerned by the fly or he lifts off, moving about searching, searching.

 My swatter is state of the art.  Clean, unpainted aluminium wire with the traditional double twist. It’s doubled into twin wires with four turns above.  Four turns below.  The top turn opens to allow a spacious open grip.  The bottom turn spreads into a large Y allowing the actual killing area known as the fan to be attached to the handle. No plastic here. My fan is a large rectangle of tight metal mesh with an edging of brown paper sewn onto the edge with cotton thread.  The mesh is a weave of thin metal wires with a spacing of less than .5 millimeter – not even the Tsetse can escape me.

 My slow movements belie the swift shifting of my eyes. Only moving the eyes, not the head, I slip into the Patio’s space and time.  Yes, the fly may have 1,000 eyes and I only 2 but mine are very sensitive to color and shape. I look for the black dot where it doesn’t belong. 

 I tense.  Spotted.  I don’t stop but do slow down. I focus. It’s only a nail in the table. I move on. Slowly, swatter cocked, eyes shifting, shifting. There!  On the back of a chair.  Oh, damn! In my disappointment at the nail, I relaxed and lowered my weapon.  Now, here’s a fly and I must raise the swatter before attacking.  I try to do it slowly but the fly feels the shift and buzzes off.  I know that buzz.  Snickering at me. He buzzes my head in triumph. He has won. This round, fly, this round. 

 I take a second and re-compose myself.  I am in position.  Swatter cocked. I move back into the hunt.  Soon, another target presents itself.  It could the the snickerer or it could be another fly.  Hard to tell.  I’m not being racist in saying they really do all look alike.

 I slip into range and with the snap of my wrist. I release. The fly crumples.  I’m a two swat man, myself, so I always follow up with a second hit.  The coup de grace’.  While I intend the mercy of a swift death, it has happened that after one blow, the fly with one good wing and three good legs left attempts to lift off but only manages to limp in a circle – a macabre dance which always ends with the second blow.

 Do not think this unfair as for example duck hunting in which a hunter armed with massive gunpower sits and waits for the casual traveler to breeze by overhead then springs the surprise of tiny BBs zipping through the air. No, no, the fly and I are more evenly matched.

 Sitting in my office, I hear the distraction of the buzz of a fly announcing his arrival.  I slowly move to grasp my swatter – always handy – and cock the weapon.  The fly immediately takes flight and leaves the room.  I pause, then lower the swatter and resume my review of last night’s Log.  The buzz returns. I hear the bump, bump, bump of the fly hitting the glass of the outside window, confused that he cannot move into the beckoning beyond.

 Again, I move to my swatter and, even more slowly raise the fan of death. Again, the fly realizes my intentions and flees the room.  I lower the swatter and move back to reading.

 Again, the fly returns.  This time drawn to a lithograph of the open New Mexico desert apparently by the horses in the scene.  Flys do love them some horse.  As the fly bounces against the glass, unable to comprehend why he can’t get to the horses, I move to my swatter.  Slowly, steathyly as an experienced old hand at this game of death, I ease my swatter into position.  One of us will surely die today, fly. 

 I take my eyes off the prize (I don’t recommend doing this for amateurs) and look out my window to the Organ Mountains.  I breath slowly and think to myself,”Yes, it’s a good day to die!”

 I find my target again and he lifts off and zig zags across my vision and out of the room.

 You can see we are more evenly matched here than any other game sport. The fly knows.  I know he knows.  Now, he doesn’t know I know but I know he doesn’t know.  That should be clear to anyone.

 TO BE CONTINUED….

Wine Corks

Natural cork, with its superior sealing properties, replaced wooden stoppers and waxed rags in wine bottles over 400 years ago.  Although some wine makers are turning to synthetic stoppers and screwcaps for safety and cost concerns, natural cork is still the choice for most.  Lightweight and near-impermeable to liquids and gases, cork is also easy to compress into bottle necks where it expands to form a tight seal, keeping valuable wine inside and damaging oxygen outside.

Cork comes from the thick outer bark of the cork oak tree which grows in Portugal and parts of Spain.  Over 50% of the world’s oak comes from Portugal and about 26% comes from Spain.  The cork oak tree must be at least 25 years old before initial harvesting can begin.  Removing the bark doesn’t damage the tree; more bark grows to replace it.  Re-harvesting can occur about every 12 years.

The bark is harvested with a specially designed axe with a broad blade.  Large rectangular sections are sliced down to the tree’s cambium layer of the trunck and larger branches.  The sections are then gently pulled away to avoid damage to the tree’s inner layers.  The slabs are then boiled in water for an hour or more.  Boiling flattens the slabs and expands the cork cells by as much as 20% into a more pliable honey-comb structure.  The rough outer section of the bark is stripped away and the slabs rest and mature for about three weeks.

The resulting cork planks are then sliced into long, thin sections.  Sharp circular cutters punch out round cork shapes.  These stoppers are then graded by quality.  The best have tight grains, small pores and no cracks.  These are then washed and disinfected with a mild hydrogen peroxide solution.  Corks are then branded or printed with logos before being shipped to wineries.

Now, you know!

Shoofly Pie

Supposedly a Southern specialty from Kentucky…all those horses, all those flies…it’s really an Amish dish from Pennsylvania.  Some recipes use molasses but these days corn syrup and brown sugar are more useful and usable in the kitchen.

Crust:           2 cups all-purpose Flour            1 tsp Salt                    ¾ cup Shortening                       5 Tbsp Ice Water

In a food processor measure the flour, salt and shortening, cover and put the processor bowl in the refrigerator for 1 hour.  Pulse process till coarse crumbs form and then add cold water 1 Tbsp at a time, pulsing till dough forms into a ball.  Remove from processor bowl, flatten slightly and wrap in plastic wrap.  Chill at least 1 hour or overnight.  Roll out on a lightly floured surface to 1/8 thickness, fit into a 9” pan.   Or just use store-bought pie crust.

Preheat oven to 350F

Filling:         ½ cup Dark Corn Syrup   ¼ cup Light Brown Sugar (packed)                   1 large egg, beaten           ½ tsp Baking Soda                    ½ cup hot water

In a bowl, combine corn syrup, brown sugar and egg.  Dissolve baking soda into the hot water and stir into syrup mixture.  Pour into crust.

Crumb Topping:    1 cup all-purpose Flour              3 Tbsp Shortening          2/3 cup Light Brown Sugar-packed               Pinch of Salt                 Pinch of Cinnamon

In a food processor bowl, measure the flour, shortening, sugar, salt and cinnamon, pulse till combined.  Sprinkle crumbs evenly over syrup mixture.
Bake for 50 to 60 minutes depending on your oven.  Done when crumb topping is a deep golden brown.  Cool on wire rack one hour before serving.

Shoofly Pie

Supposedly a Southern specialty from Kentucky…all those horses, all those flies…it’s really an Amish dish from Pennsylvania.  Some recipes use molasses but these days corn syrup and brown sugar are more useful and usable in the kitchen.

Crust:           2 cups all-purpose Flour            1 tsp Salt

                    ¾ cup Shortening                       5 Tbsp Ice Water

In a food processor measure the flour, salt and shortening, cover and put the processor bowl in the refrigerator for 1 hour.  Pulse process till coarse crumbs form and then add cold water 1 Tbsp at a time, pulsing till dough forms into a ball.  Remove from processor bowl, flatten slightly and wrap in plastic wrap.  Chill at least 1 hour or overnight.  Roll out on a lightly floured surface to 1/8 thickness, fit into a 9” pan.   Or just use store-bought pie crust.

Preheat oven to 350F

Filling:         ½ cup Dark Corn Syrup   ¼ cup Light Brown Sugar (packed)

                    1 large egg, beaten           ½ tsp Baking Soda

                    ½ cup hot water

In a bowl, combine corn syrup, brown sugar and egg.  Dissolve baking soda into the hot water and stir into syrup mixture.  Pour into crust.

Crumb Topping:    1 cup all-purpose Flour              3 Tbsp Shortening

                              2/3 cup Light Brown Sugar-packed

                              Pinch of Salt                              Pinch of Cinnamon

In a food processor bowl, measure the flour, shortening, sugar, salt and cinnamon, pulse till combined.  Sprinkle crumbs evenly over syrup mixture.

Bake for 50 to 60 minutes depending on your oven.  Done when crumb topping is a deep golden brown.  Cool on wire rack one hour before serving.

6 Cucumbers
1 750 ml bottle of vodka

It’s your choice, of course, for the vodka.  The only test is would you drink it without the flavors?

Wash and slice the cucumbers, leaving the green peelings on.   In a glass vessel, add the vodka.  Make sure the vodka covers the cucumbers.   Infuse for at least 3 days.  A week would be better.

Hold the infusion covered and out of direct sunlight.

5 cups of Cantaloupe peeled and cut up
1 750 ml bottle of vodka

It’s your choice, of course, for the vodka.  The only test is would you drink it without the flavors?

Add the cantaloup to a glass vessel.  Add the vodka.  Make sure the vodka covers the fruit.   Infuse for at least 3 days.  A week would be better.

Hold the infusion out of direct sunlight.

4 Cinnamon Sticks
6 Red Apples
1 750 ml Bottle of Vodka

It’s your choice, of course, for the vodka.  The only test is would you drink it without the flavors?

Core and slice the apples.  Leave the red peelings on.   In a glass vessel, add the apples and cinnamo
stickes.  Make sure the vodka covers the apples.   Infuse for at least 3 days.  A week would be better.

Hold the infusion out of direct sunlight.

I thought you might like to see what we think about when we get a customer comment of food preparation -

A customer was shocked, shocked to discover we do not de-stem our fresh spinach leaves when we make a spinach salad.  He let us know that we were total idiots for do this and he failed to understand how we could possibly stay in business which such a practice going on…..

Posted For Staff Meeting Discussion

 REF:  Spinach and Stems

 Regarding the customer comment that we should de-stem the spinach for the fresh spinach salad, I note that we have been serving the spinach salad this way for many years without one comment on the stems. Pro or con.  Given that we have, in fact, had many compliments on the salad and that sales of the salad do not seem to have been affected by the stem or no stem concern.   I think we will leave things alone and monitor the situation for further customer reaction.

 It’s safe to say that, at home, most people probabaly de-stem their spinach for salads.   While at the same time, most people leave the stems on when cooking fresh spinach. 

 We have chosen not to waste the stems on fresh spinach for our salads since we don’t have an active compost pile at this time.  We feel the stems add a texture and a sharper flavor to the fresh spinach which would be wasted if we did de-stem.  We believe that, given the carbon footprint used to get the stems from the farm to the factory to the distributor and then to us, we would be contributing to global climate change if we did not use the stems in some way.

 We take this stand proudly and greenly and call upon the restaurants of the world to make this change in spinach saladry composition.   Come!  Join us as we do our part to change the world!  Unite to stop this waste of human food while thousand are starving in Africa!

 In any case, if the comment comes up again, say, ”Our Chef likes the texture and sharper flavor of the stems.  He thinks it adds a little something different to the salad.”  And report the comment in the Daily Log or at staff meeting.

Jerry